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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23525491">midnight smoke</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/mattels/pseuds/mattels'>mattels</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>RuPaul's Drag Race RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Lesbian AU, Mentions of past abuse, Short One Shot, Smoking, biological women being biological women, but let me live my fantasy okay, but this really is the trixie and katya show honey, dialogue is a struggle 4 me, meet-cute ish, other girls are here somewhere, pearl ginger adore and raja are mentioned, they get together real quick cos i don't understand how to write suspense, trixya - Freeform, yes i know trixie doesn't smoke</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 07:00:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,780</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23525491</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/mattels/pseuds/mattels</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>trixie swears she's not a smoker, yet standing under the moon, blowing smoke with the girl from the floor above, she's seriously considering becoming one.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Trixie Mattel/Katya Zamolodchikova</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>56</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>midnight smoke</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>(tw: mentions of abuse)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <hr/><p> </p><p>Trixie Mattel is ready to jump off a fucking building.</p><p>Well, maybe not really, but she's damn close to. Work was shitty-- but in fairness, work is <em>always</em> shitty. She fucking hates her job: waiting tables at a vegan restaurant, serving rich white Stepford wives who gossip loudly with one another. Like nobody cares about your new pool boy, Barbara. The new girl, Pearl (and Jesus Christ, what sort of fucking lunatic calls their daughter <em>Pearl--</em> not that Trixie is much better), talks so slowly with a vocal fry off the charts, successfully annoying Trixie to no end. And to top it all off, her new neighbours kept her up all night with their loud arguing, which quickly descended into equally loud sex noises. Gross.</p><p>
  <em>Thin walls people, thin fucking walls. </em>
</p><p>So is it really any wonder that Trixie stalked up onto her apartment’s open roof, as soon as she got home, lighting a cigarette hanging limply from her Barbie pink lips. She leans against the iron railing-- built to presumably to stop residents from throwing themselves off, which is fair enough, the apartment complex is ugly as sin.</p><p>Trixie really can’t call herself a smoker, she doesn’t need to suck one down every few minutes like Ginger does whenever she has a shift. But Adore had gifted her a pack on a shit day-- not dissimilar from today-- and she likes the way it makes tension seemingly disappear from her body after particularly miserable shifts on particularly miserable days.</p><p>It's late, probably too late, but she always works the closing shift on Tuesdays. The road below her is quiet and the air is crisp with the promise of fall just around the corner. Trees’ leaves are just starting to change from their summery greens into pale yellows and butterscotch-y oranges.</p><p>Trixie’s smoke curls around the air, dancing as it diffuses itself into the night, and she sighs contently. A cool breeze sways smaller plants, leaving a wake of goosebumps on her arms. She thinks about going to her room to get a sweater, but quickly decides the two flights of stairs aren’t worth it. Besides, she has no desire to listen to her neighbours' fucking again.</p><p>"Got a light?" A voice says from behind her. Trixie jumps at least a foot in the air.</p><p>"Fucking hell," Trixie swears, turning around, "was it really necessary to give me a heart attack?" The girl she faces cackles at Trixie's face, stomping her jelly-shoed feet into the ground.</p><p>"Sorry Barbie doll, didn’t mean to scare you." Trixie recognises the girl as living a floor or so up from her. She has chin length wavy platinum hair with blunt bangs she's clearly cut herself, red lipstick smudged, as is the dark eyeshadow carelessly rimmed around her almond-shaped eyes, pale blue under the light of the moon.</p><p>"Tracy right? I’m Katya, I’m not sure we’ve met yet," she says, walking towards Trixie, and sticking out her tanned hand. Her fingers are covered in an assortment of hideous rings, turning the skin under them slightly green.</p><p>Trixie just stares at her.</p><p>"I live like a floor above you," Katya smiles, her teeth are all pearly white and perfect. "Not a stalker, I swear." She laughs, raising her hands in mock defence.</p><p>Trixie laughs at this, "I'll give you a light if you promise you're not an axe murderer."</p><p>"Well, I can't give away all my secrets! Buy me dinner first, at least!"</p><p>Trixie smiles at Katya's pretty face, "well, if you're a murderer, swear you'll kill me first and I'll lend a light." Katya cackles again, gripping onto Trixie's bicep, jelly shoes stamping into the concrete.</p><p>"Deal Tracy! Now gimme that light, can't you see I'm an suffering addict?" Trixie rolls her eyes, reaching into her pocket to procure a pink lighter. Katya's stuck a cigarette between her lips, "light me?" She says, the paper mumbles her words slightly, and she cups her hand around it so the flame will catch. Trixie complies, mock-rolling her blue eyes again.</p><p>"I haven't seen you up here before," Katya says accusatorially after she had taken a long drag, "it's usually me and Raja. Have you met her? She's like ninety, but she's cute." She laughs at her own jokes, and Trixie can't help but smile with her.</p><p>"Yeah I know Raja."</p><p>"So what are you doing out here tonight, Tracy?"</p><p>Trixie laughs again, "my name is Trixie, you gila monster, and I had an incredibly shit day, thank you very much." Katya squawks with laughter, lightly hitting Trixie's arm.</p><p>"Well, at least you still look gorgeous, <em>Trixie</em>." She flushes pink at this, turning away to smoke, in hopes Katya won't notice. "But take it from me, your new favourite gila monster, smoking will, sadly, not keep you looking so beautiful."</p><p>"Shut the fuck up, Mary." Trixie turns back, facing Katya, "I can only hope to look as good as you do when I'm fifty."</p><p>"You fucking bitch!" Another squawk of scream laughter-- undeniably infectious. Katya looks pretty when she laughs like this; all twinkling eyes and smile lines. But Katya is hot regardless: she's little and lithe, strong muscles stand out on her tanned calves, not to mention how good her thighs look wearing shorts that may or may not be the world's shortest fucking shorts. (Like they're so short, they should be illegal in all fifty states.)</p><p>Trixie is totally fucking fucked.</p><p>
  <em>Like totally and completely fucked.</em>
</p><p>Trixie knows she's pretty. Like <em>Malibu Barbie</em> pretty. But she's also conscious of her thick thighs and ass, her soft stomach, and her not quite symmetrical boobs. She's never quite perfect. She can't help but stare listlessly at herself in the mirror after looking at girls on Instagram for hours, picking out features she wished were hers: a nose here, arms there, a waist like that girls, but an ass like that other girl; constructing her very own <em>Trixie Mattel Barbie</em> in her mind.</p><p>Growing up didn't help. Seemingly overnight her baby fat had morphed into curves. Suddenly men stopped at stared at her on the streets, wolf-whistling at her like she was a dog. So she learnt to cover up-- sweaters upon sweaters to hide her new breasts, old, ill-fitting jeans hiding her hips. She didn't wear makeup unless it was to hide a new bruise gifted to her by her stepfather, as a way of punishing her for things she couldn't control. But it didn't matter what she wore or how she wore it, it never seemed to stop people from noticing her.</p><p>Trixie took it into her own hands when she finally got the fuck out of Wisconsin, she was bored of dark clothes and trying to hide herself; she was bored of listening to the shit her stepfather called her. Her mother told she looked trashy when her favourite skirt reached above her fingertips, so she made a point of wearing it everyday. Her little sister whispered conspiratorially to her she looked <em>'like a bitch'</em> when she wore black eyeliner, so Trixie laughed and drew her wings even bigger.</p><p>Standing under the moon, Katya looks perfectly at home, comfortable in her own skin. Trixie longs to be like her.</p><p>"What are you staring at, mama?" Katya murmurs to her, smoke creeping out of her lips simultaneously. </p><p>"Nothing," Trixie turns away, looking down at the road below them. She takes one final drag, and stubs out her cigarette, dropping it onto the ground.</p><p>Katya follows suit, blowing her last puff into the darkness of the night. "Forgive me if I'm being too forward," Katya reaches out, gently pulling Trixie's jaw so she faces her, "but I am incredibly homosexual, I would like nothing more than to kiss you right now, Trixie."</p><p>Trixie's eyes widen a little, shocked by Katya's directness, and she laughs. "Oh honey, you think I'm gonna let you fuck up my lipstick? I paid thirty dollars for this, bitch, the least you can do is respect it!"</p><p>Katya screams with laughter again, throwing her head back. "You fucking <em>bitch!</em> You're really out here being so incredibly hot-- don't fucking laugh, I'm serious, you cunt-- denying me of my dying wish? For <em>lipstick</em>?"</p><p>"Dying wish? You're not that fucking old!"</p><p>"With the amount I smoke, I might as well just off myself now, y'know, before the cancer has me in it's clutches! Goodbye Talulah!" Katya mimes climbing over the railing they're leaning on.</p><p>Trixie laughs unrestrained, "good riddance!" Katya pouts at her, Trixie sticks out her pink tongue, blowing a raspberry. "You swear you're not an axe-murderer?" Katya nods at this, "you wanna come into mine for a night cap? Maybe some makeup remover too?"</p><p>Katya nods eagerly, practically skipping back into the building's hallway. Together they walk down the stairs, and Trixie leads the way to her apartment, unlocking the door with her key painted pink.</p><p>Trixie's apartment isn't exactly anything to behold, but Katya marvels at it, taking in the pale pink walls, and various tapestries she's hung in order to make it feel more homey. "This is so cute, Tracy!" Trixie giggles a little, taking Katya into her small kitchen.</p><p>"Sorry the selection is minimal, but I can offer a glass of wine? Or just straight tequila?" She says, reaching into a cabinet to hold up a bottle.</p><p>Katya smiles, jumping up to sit on one of the spare countertops. "Could I get a cup of coffee? I'm trying to stay sober."</p><p>Trixie nods, slightly embarrassed after offering Katya liquor, "sorry, I didn't know. I wouldn't have offered-"</p><p>"Why are you apologising mama? It's not your fault I can't deal with adult responsibilities."</p><p>Trixie's hands shake a little as she pours hot water over the shitty instant coffee (sadly, the only coffee she has), passing one mug to Katya and cradling the other in her cold hands. "You take milk? Sugar?" She says, opening the fridge</p><p>Katya shakes her head smiling at Trixie, while she takes a sip. "Thank you," she says quietly, "this is perfect." Trixie smiles at her, coming over to stand so she's facing Katya, putting her mug on the counter next to her. "I know I already said it earlier, but I'd really like to kiss you, Trix." Katya leans towards her, putting her mug next to Trixie's. "Is that okay?"</p><p>"More than okay," Trixie whispers, filling the space between them.</p><p>Katya's lips are dry and slightly chapped, she tastes like cigarettes and shitty coffee and Mac lipstick. Her skinny arms are around Trixie's shoulders, as she leans forwards to deepen their kiss.Trixie is kissing a complete stranger. A complete <em>nicotine-addicted-jelly-shoes-wearing-possible-axe-murdering-serial-killer</em> stranger.</p><p>And Trixie's never been happier.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you for reading !! means the absolute world to me when you guys leave kudos and comment-- i literally read all of them and cry cos they're so sweet !! writing these longer (this isn't actually long but let me live my fantasy) pieces is very new to me so constructive and regular criticism is always appreciated !</p><p>stay safe lovelies xx</p></blockquote></div></div>
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